Sunday, March 28, 2010

Preachers are haters...well, some of them.

Disclaimer: I don't know what religion you are. Frankly I don't care. Your religion is your business. I'm not a religious person, but I do believe in God. So don't think I'm pickin on your pastor, I don't even know him...no need gettin all touchy 'n shyt.

Aight, so I had a dream about going to church the other night. This is strange because I haven't been to church in years, but I guess when you work at a church, it's bound to creep in there somehow.

Anyway...

I got to thinkin about the churches I used to go to and the various preachers and ministers I've listened to through the years. And I've come to a conclusion: These niggaz are haters.

Think about how many preachers you've heard talk about all the drinkin, sex and partyin they did "before I found the Lord". But naw, they don't want YOU to do any of that. They were gettin drunk every weekend, different woman every night and all that shyt. But ME? Oh no...they don't want ME to have any fun. They want me to pray, read the Bible, sing songs...oh yeah, and give them more of my money.

I mean, really...why is every preacher tryna sell you books, DVDs and all this crap? If I wanna know what you got to say about somethin, I'll show up on Sunday. TD Jakes is prolly the biggest violator of people's wallets. This dude has these huge conferences and every year sells "early-bird specials" for the next year's conference. And of course he's got his entire library of "spiritual wisdom" or whatever he wants to call it for sale. But people eat it up, so I can't knock the hustle.

But aside from being "God hustlers", these cats are still haters. Can I have my fun? Can I get my share of drunkenness and loose women? Ya'll had a "moment of clarity" and all that enlightenment crap, can I have mine too?

But these days, the way some of these preachers are acting, they may not have left their lives of sin behind. I'm hearing stories about preachers having affairs with married women. Hell, even preachers on the DL having affairs with married men.

Maybe I'm jus hatin on their hustle...naw, not really tho. Cuz they can have all that stuff if they want. I jus don't don't wanna play their game or have them play me.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

We Finally Have Health Care Reform...Hooray...(kinda)

Now don't ya'll get me wrong. I do think that money hungry corporations do a lot of foul shit. I think that there are plenty of greedy sumbitches out there who only care about the "almighty dollar" and such. I'm not gonna defend them or anything...but I have a couple problems with this health care reform thing.

Aight, number one: Don't need the government telling me how to spend my money. Ya'll can say all that "It's for your own good bullshyt" if you want. Plenty of shyt can be done "for your own good", but I'm a grown ass man. If government is goin around tellin grown folk what's "for their own good", that's a slippery slope I'm not tryin to ride. There's supposed to be this thing called "personal responsibility" and "freedom of choice" that we get to enjoy in this country and I, for one, would like to keep that rollin.

And making me pay a fine for NOT having insurance...yeah, ya'll can eat a dick for that. I either pay to have insurance or pay to NOT having insurance. Yeah, whoever put that shyt in can eat a fat, uninsured penis.

Second, do ya'll really think this isn't gonna create more debt? Name the first government program that DIDN'T create debt. Go ahead. No rush...wanna check google...maybe wikipedia? Here's a hint...NOT GONNA FIND ONE!!! OK, next assignment, what was the first government program that was actually successful? Hmmm....yeah, they're battin the opposite of 1.000 on that. Public schools, Medicaid, Welfare, all this shyt is bad, gettin worse and has very little hope in sight.

But gettin back to the "it's gonna create more debt" point, let's just look at this rationally. If it costs $5,000 to perform an X-Ray, but people are paying on a sliding scale...well guess what, even if you can only pay $200 the other $4800 is coming from somewhere. And if you're on the government plan, guess where it comes from? That's right. Tax money.

Now I feel some of you pulling away from me and I understand why. You say, "But if people are paying into the system, it won't be taxes that cover the cost, it'll be covered by what people are paying." Naw naw naw, I think you're a lil too smart for that. If it's $5000 for the X-Ray, it would take 25 people payin $200 to cover it. But please believe, all 25 of those people are gonna be creating other medical bills that need to be covered. The government option is gonna be used by the people who are too poor to have "regular" insurance. And with all those people creating bills they can't cover, even by pooling their money, well...they're prolly gonna come up short. And who's gonna cover the gap? Heheh...nevermind.

Finally, I'd like to address the foolishness that is allowing abortion but requiring insurance. OK, so...women can do what they want to their bodies (and by their bodies I mean the one growing inside them), but I can't "risk my own health" because "Big Brother" says it's not a good idea. Why does Big Brother tell some of these bitches to stop fukkin? Huh? Where was Big Brother on that? I mean, if Big Brother gonna start tellin people what to do, don't half-step, go all the way live...(see what I mean about this slippery slope?)

Aight, so is reform necessary? Sure. We don't live in a perfect democracy (I think our government makes it too damn difficult for systems to work the way their supposed to, but I won't bore you with that crap.) Yeah, there's some predatory companies and such out there and hell, it's a free economy, so what are ya gonna do?

Here's a couple ideas: Take out this requirement for insurance. Allow people to buy insurance across state lines (making companies more competitive, another thing we're SUPPOSED to have in this country) and this whole coverage for preexisting conditions...ok, if someone is born with a condition can't hold that against 'em. But if you smoke 3 packs a day, get lung cancer then wanna get insurance...yeeeeeeeeaaaaaah, you shyt outta luck.

But hey, it is what it is...

Thursday, March 4, 2010

High School...4 years I'd never do again

I volunteer at a local high school. I'll refrain from saying the name for obvious reasons. But I swear, it makes me so glad that I made it out of high school. I'm sitting here listening to the conversations and stories these kids are sharing...and I wonder if I was this damn corny back when I was 14-18.

All the weak pick-up lines the guys use on the girls. The tricks we thought worked on teachers to hide contraband...that haven't changed in like 25 years. But I think it's the pervasive attitude that they know something that grown folks don't. NEWS FLASH KID: Only thing you know that I don't is Wacka Flocka lyrics. And I don't even wanna learn that shyt. "Ohlehdoooit" gets stuck in my head everyday and I'm about 20 minutes from buying a drill to try and dig it out.

But really, there's nothing about high school that appeals to anybody, is there? Sitting in boring classes, eating crappy cafeteria lunches, teachers breathing all over you tryin to make sure you aren't doin all the dumb stuff you really REALLY wanna do...

I appreciate high school, but only for one reason...it prepared me for college. And COLLEGE my friends...whoo hoo hooooooo "OHLEHDOOOIT!!!" I'd pay for 2 years if they'd give me 1. High school was a preparation for college and if done right, you'll learn to be careful in high school so you don't end up droppin out of college because you gotta start makin child support payments or you came up on possession charges. High school is kinda like boot camp, I guess. Everybody goes through it (well, MOST everybody), everybody got funny stories...but I'll be damned if I'mma go back.

What exactly is "Pizzle Wizzdom"?

Well, I'm glad you asked. "Pizzle Wizzdom" is nothing more than one man's opinion. But it isn't the opinion that matters, moreso the fact that he is willing to share that opinion, defend it and (if properly persuaded) change it. Too often people are either too scared to offend others or too easily offended by others. It sometimes gets to the point that people just don't want to say what's on their mind. We're so busy tryin to stay in our "politically tested, socially approved" lane that we get scared to be ourselves. Look, who cares if somebody doesn't like you? I don't. You could think I'm a jerk, asshole...whatever you come up wit, I've prolly heard worse already. End of the day, you don't pay my bills and I ain't tryna fuck ya. So...

Don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna be up on soap boxes, talking deep philosophical stuff all the time...I mean, I do have a Philosophy degree, but that's beside the point. Point is, say what's on your mind. Just be sure you're willing to accept the consequences. I wouldn't suggest a skin head go to a Brooklyn housing project and start spewing racial slurs...but if they did, they'd jus have to accept the ass-whoopin that came with it.

So in short, "Pizzle Wizzdom" is to say what you feel. Better out than in...like when you hold a fart too long, but finally let it go. Yeah, you'll feel better.